worked on the float today. it was lots of fun. i hope it looks good. i'm so tired i can't even think of a good post what-so-ever.
she's going away.
she's going away.
what's wrong with my life today?
i'm a bad one
i'm a good one
i'm a sick one
with a smile.
i can't take this.
born to break this.
i don't usually believe in tarot, but good god..this stuff is so dead on. it's quite possibly scary.
Chapter 1. How Kristyn Relates to Other People
Taurus on the 7th house cusp
Your intense need to be in control of your situation along with your dread of losing anything either emotionally or materially is the underlying reason you are so drawn to people you feel are reliable and dependable. You tend to attract partners with money. You are passionate and deeply emotional but often rather reserved and secretive. Your partners tend to be less complicated and often quite possessive. They become insecure when they are not sure about what you are thinking or feeling. Jealousy may become an issue. You do like having your own way and one way or another you manage to get it. Despite your powerful persona, however, you are emotionally far needier than most people realize for love and acceptance from people who admire your strength rather than fear it. Your partners tend to be charming, romantic and often creative. While they may outwardly yield to your need to lead the way, they are by no means weak. Sometimes they are gently manipulative and can be quite stubborn. Physical attractiveness matters to you.
Moon in the 7th house
Your self-image (particularly as a young person) is so closely tied up with your perception of the way others view you, you can be quite chameleon-like in adapting to that perception, allowing others to relate to their own projections and not your needs. As you mature and become less self-protective emotionally, you expose your needs and feelings with less anxiety and enjoy close, nurturing relationships with those who encourage you to express your feelings, not mask them. You could succeed in public life.
Venus, ruler of the 7th house, is in 9th
If you don't fall in love with someone of a different race, religion or nationality, the person you bond with will come from a background very different from your own. This could be someone you met in an educational setting or while one of you was traveling. Your particular brand of romanticism -- intense to begin with -- requires a spiritual, philosophical meeting of the minds. If that isn't there, it will not sustain your interest sexually, emotionally or intellectually. Ideally, you and your partner will explore each other's worlds together perhaps through travel, perhaps through study or shared experiences. For you a relationship is a shared journey. You may find that the important people in your life are teachers, lawyers, or are involved with spiritual work, publishing or, possibly, the media. These are areas, of course, you may be involved with yourself as your own talents are considerable. You are very idealistic and you will not compromise for so-called practical purposes. As much as you may want a relationship, you would rather be alone than with someone who wasn't right.
Sun Conjunct Venus
Most people like you. You form relationships easily but may have some difficulty sustaining them. You tend to project your own ego ideals onto your partner, sometimes at the expense of relating to their needs. For you, admiration is a prerequisite for love.
Sun Conjunct Mars
If you act upon your natural instincts, you are aggressive, sexual and competitive. If you do not, you may be somewhat passive and fearful with a great deal of repressed anger which expresses itself in temper. Your ego needs are exceptionally strong.
Sun Square Ascendant
You have a strong, dynamic personality which is not always supported by the inner confidence that you are sufficiently recognized and respected. You may, at times, over-compensate for this anxiety by being excessively assertive or egocentric.
Sun Square Moon
When you were growing up, there was a distance between your parents either physically or emotionally. You did not experience mother/father, male/female, yin/yang working together as a unit. Thus, you may have difficulty with at least one intimate tie.
Sun Trine Saturn
You are serious, responsible, well-organized and protective. You take care of the people to whom you are close and see to it that their practical needs are attended to. For you a relationship is successful when it falls into a comfortable, pleasant routine.
Sun Trine Jupiter
You have a genial, pleasant quality which inspires confidence in others. It sometimes surprises you the way people trust you with their innermost thoughts. Moral integrity is important to you and, while you are not judgmental, you will not violate a principle.
Sun Trine Uranus
You have a unique view of life and have been fortunate in finding friends and partners with whom you can share it. Your relationships will be most successful when you also have in your life an interest, goal or project which absorbs both of you equally.
Sun Sesquiquadrate Neptune
Your father was either over-idealized or he was rejected as a role model. Either way, your concept of what a man should be is not based upon a mortal person, but upon an ideal. This may lead to unrealistic expectations in close personal relationships.
Moon Opposite Ascendant
You often feel emotionally misunderstood. You may have learned as a child to hide your true feelings in order to accommodate those around you. As an adult, your outer manner often belies your inner responses more than you may consciously realize or intend.
Moon Square Venus
Your emotional life is turbulent. Those who love you aren't always very nurturing and those who nurture you often don't truly understand you. You are always involved in a close relationship, but it rarely has the emotional intimacy you privately long for.
Moon Square Midheaven
You are forever embroiled in controversy with people in positions of authority which, at times, may attract public attention. You want and need approval more than you care to admit to yourself, but it must be on your terms and not entail any compromise.
Moon Square Mars
Your love-hate relationship with your mother has led to an emotional ambivalence in current close ties. You are, at once, very needy and very angry about your neediness. This may make you somewhat cantankerous at times. You are very quick-tempered.
Mercury Conjunct Venus
Intelligence is sexy to you. If a person you find physically attractive isn't also bright, verbal and someone you can talk to, you're not interested. You have a highly developed aesthetic sense and are drawn to people of taste, wit and charm.
Mercury Conjunct Mars
Since you tend to be rather irritable and sharp-tongued at times you require a partner with a sense of humor who is not too thin-skinned. You are bright, curious and restless and enjoy the company of those who are equally high-spirited and enterprising.
Mercury Square Ascendant
You relate to your world through your intellect but you may be so absorbed in your own ideas or projects that you don't always perceive when misunderstandings or cross-purposes place you at odds with others and set up unnecessary barriers to communication.
Mercury Trine Saturn
You are extremely well-organized and anyone who isn't equally so would annoy you. You are also very practical and fond of routine. A madcap type you couldn't depend on would ultimately make you miserable - no matter how intense the initial emotional attraction.
Mercury Trine Uranus
You have an innovative turn of mind and may have a talent for an unusual subject. Your ideas are often considered to be ahead of your time. You can be somewhat impersonal and detached - even with close ties. You need to share controversial ideas with friends.
Mercury Sesquiquadrate Neptune
Your imagination is so powerful that, if you don't have a strong creative or spiritual outlet, you may at times be over-influenced by your own fantasies or those of others. Beware of gullibility. In the long run, telling the truth is in your best interest.
Venus Conjunct Mars
Yours was not a happy childhood and, while there is nothing you want more than a close love relationship, you may also fear it. You probably have an active sex life but may have some discomfort acknowledging feelings of love, dependence or vulnerability.
Venus Square Ascendant
You are personally attractive with a natural charm which tends to draw people to you. Your native courtesy tends to make others assume that you share their values even when this isn't quite the case. You are unusually sensitive to others' appearance.
Venus Trine Uranus
There is nothing humdrum about the way that you love. You have a flair for the unusual and the creative and are drawn to those who shun the conventional. You shy away from those who tend to be over-possessive. Your love affairs are also wonderful friendships.
Venus Trine Saturn
While you may not be emotionally demonstrative or sentimental, you love deeply, lastingly and loyally. You may be strongly drawn to people either much older or much younger than you are. Love, for you, has always entailed an enormous amount of responsibility.
Venus Sesquiquadrate Neptune
Love for you is often a "divine discontent". You are so romantic and idealistic it is difficult for any mortal person to sustain your interest without disappointing you. Your need to idealize loved ones may make you susceptible to illusion.
Mars Square Ascendant
You have a tremendous amount of energy and, in a relationship, are happiest when you and your partner are actively participating in something together. You tend to be quite competitive and can even be somewhat combative. You should always avoid the timid.
Saturn Square Midheaven
You learned at an early age to be cautious with people in a position of authority. This reserve may also extend to personal relationships with those you may admire or respect. Old parenting issues inevitably infiltrate all of your close relationships.
Neptune Trine Midheaven
You are guided far more by your spiritual ideals than by more material motivations. While intimate ties are important to you, if the other person didn't share your more cosmic goals, the relationship could not last. Your dreams often become realities.
Pluto Sextile Midheaven
Power struggles often enter into your relationships - both personal and professional. You have an innate fear of being dominated owing to your experience with a controlling parent. Strong people fascinate you. You're a little afraid of people you love.
Moon does not aspect Mercury
It's as if the emotional and rational sides of your nature take turns expressing themselves. You are either utterly detached and objective about a situation or so emotionally involved you have no perspective. You are not in touch with your feelings.
Listening : Rain Fall
